Atvar Wins
by D.J. Clarke
Summary: Even though peace reigns, Fleetlord Atvar is less than happy with the situation on Earth. In a drunken haze he comes across an experimental device that looks across the dimensions to see what could have happened. A series of shorts where Drunken Atvar looks for a better world.
1. Drunken Atvar

Atvar stumbled through the doorway in a drunken haze. "Ssssttttupidddd unisherse! _Hic_-Hateshs meese! I hateshs ish ri-_urp_-ightsh backscks. _Hic_" he slurred drunkenly taking another swig from his bottle.

"Ah exalted Fleetlord, are you alright?" a scientist said trembling at the sight of the drunken fleetlord appearing in the doorway.

"I'sh ish fine," Atvar said sadly. "The Usi-unish-unisherve hates me, b-b-b-_burp_-but I feel fine." Atvar put a friendly hand over the scientists shoulder. "Whash a g-_hic_-reat shientish doing shis late a night?"

The scientist was too afraid to remind the exalted Fleetlord it was 10am. "Uh, well, uh."

"Spitz it outsh lishard! Or I'lls shoots ya outsa the air-air-air. H-help me out friend, itsh that -_hic_- thingy door watchmacallits? _Burp_ walk through it to gesh outta this here shi-h_ic_- ship," Atvar said, proud of himself for the minimal slurring.

"The airlock?"

Atvar hissed in pleasure and took another swig from his bottle. "Tttthhhaaatttsss the two. You'ssa good little lishturd, not likes that ashhole Straha. I tells ya whats I's gon-_hic_-gonna do. If you's can tellsh messa goody goody news, I's a gonna makes ya head o' re-re-researchy shit. That Ttomatolls guy is too fuck'en d-d-d-URP! Oh Emperor! I donst reme-_spit_-mber eating that!"

The scientist stepped carefully around the mess and went to his machine. "Well, um, exalted Fleetlord," he began.

An empty bottle whipped past his head and shattered against the wall. "Enough o' your fanshy ash talk. Lesh sciency and more goody's -hic-!"

"Ah," the Scientist stared in horror at the Fleetlord now peering at him with drunken menace and somehow holding another bottle of alcohol.

The lizard decided he didn't want to know how the naked Fleetlord had kept it out of sight until now. "I made a machine that can see through dimensions. Type in something you'd like to see and if theirs a dimension that fits it will show it."

Atvar glared at the scientist as the words slowly penetrated through the many layers of alcohol induced haze. "So's," he said finally, "iffen I types in say 'stupid Big Uglies fighten' blue cat people and dying, hehe, I'd shee it? For real and for true? Hehehe!"

"Yes, exalted Fleetlord."

Atvar shoved the scientist out of the way and stumbled over to the device, it looked like a big computer, he fondled it dreamily. "Oh yesh honey, you's and me ish gonna have SSSSOOOOO mush fun tog-hic-ether!" With a look of sheer pleasure in his eyes he turned on the machine.

The scientist saw the look of lust in his Fleetlords' eyes and shuddered as the drunken lizard shivered in delight. The machines screen lit up and Atvar stared drunkenly at it. With a shaking, hesitant hand and a look of fear flickering across his face, he typed in two simple words with extreme care. '**Atvar wins**'.

The machine began to hum.


	2. Blaze of Glory

**Blaze of Glory**

* * *

"Exalted Fleetlord Atvar," the scientist said cautiously.

"Shush! I wansa shee me win," Atvar told him as he stared at the screen.

"But Fleetlord Atvar, I must tell you that not all the bugs have been worked out. The first search is always-" he said.

"SHUT UP! Gets outta my shight. GO! GO!" Atvar shouted falling out of the chair to attack the scientist.

The scientist ran out of the room in stark raving horror.

"Shtupid schientish, al-hic-waysh with the talky talky. Nesher do-ey do-ey," Atvar said to himself.

He sat down at the wonderful machine and saw that it had finished its search, he peered at the screen with drunken wonder.  
_**'Error. Parameters incorrect. "ATVAR WINS" Impossible'**_

Atvar felt the alcohol draining out of his shocked brain.

Impossible?

This machine that could find any dimension couldn't find one dimension where he won.

Impossible.

Slowly he typed in '_Atvar Loses_'. His few strands of sanity begging the machine to repeat the error message.

The machine hummed and the screen immediately filled with names, details and even pictures showing the Race lose again and again. He clicked on some of the names and watched as the Race died from disease, nuclear bombs, aliens, big ugly's beyond number and other horrible fates. Through it all those Atvars struggled and fought, only to succumb to traitors, bullets, bombs and despair. Hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of Atvars' all dying and failing, cursing their fate. Saying to the end, '_This was suppose to be easy_'.

The final mists of the alcohol induced haze cleared from his brain. He stood up and headed for the door, the dark eyes that had been bleary and beaten were frighteningly clear and focused.

An hour later Exalted Fleetlord Atvar reached the command centre of the flag ship. He stood erect and his elaborate body paint almost glowed. The skeleton crew came to attention as he entered.

"Stop all communications with the fleet and with Tosev 3," he ordered immediately.

"Exalted Fleetlord that is impossible," the Commander said his mouth dropping open in shock.

"As you said I am the Exalted Fleetlord, and on board this ship there is nothing impossible for me. Now stop all communications or I will have you shot," Atvar commanded, his tone allowing no argument.

"Yes Exalted Fleetlord, at once Exalted Fleetlord," the Commander said, and quickly began giving orders.

Atvar sat down at the command station for the Fleetlord. His claws were a blur as he typed in orders to dozens of different sections informing them to shut everything down and either prepare to leave the ship or to begin a rundown for launch and hibernation.

He briefly turned to the Ship Commander and told him to prepare to return Home. Again the Commanders mouth opened in surprise, but Fleetlord Atvar ignored him as he continued to send orders.

Ten hours later after having ignored countless communication attempts most of the shuttles left the flag ship carrying unnecessary crew members and a single message with a file that was coded not to be readable for nine years.  
As the world watched in wonder the Flag Ship of the Race invasion fleet headed Home.

**5 Months Later, near Pluto**

Atvar watched as the last of the crew entered hibernation. He would enter hibernation last, it would be risky but his insane mind didn't care about the dangers, only the rewards. Holding the skeleton crew together for 5 months hadn't been easy it had required strict discipline and even some cruelty, fortunately it had worked.

Atvar walked through the silent ship to the command centre. He wasn't skilled at navigation but he had learned how to do it early in his career, and he had spent the last 5 months fine tuning his math. He set the massive ship on a new course, watching the screen patiently as the incredibly fast yet lumbering vessel began to turn ever so slightly. Seeing that everything was in order Atvar took one last look around the great ship and with a cough of sadness returned to the hibernation chamber and entered his deep sleep.

**9 Years in the future**

The humans were confused, even more confused then they had been when Fleetlord Atvar had returned to Home.

Everywhere the Lizards were leaving. The settlements and cities were being evacuated and the great colony fleet was being reboarded. A few chosen humans joined the mass exodus. Attempts to determine why they were evacuated were stonewalled. In the final months of the evacuation the humans fearing the worst attacked the Race ships. Nuclear bombs, kamikaze attack runs and chemical weapons of all kinds covered the planet and near Earth orbit. The few Race survivors headed for Home, leaving the humans a war torn and decimated planet.

The survivors rejoiced at having won the war and finally freeing their planet from inhuman hands.

**10 Years in the Future**

Atvar awoke from his sleep. On unsteady legs he walked to the command centre to see if his plan had worked.

Looking at the screens his mouth opened in laughter, he made a strange grunting sound a mockery of human laughter. It had worked. They were as close to light speed as physically possible, and the Earth was just ahead. The long looping course had allowed the massive ship to build up velocity and return to its final resting place.

Atvar nudged the ship so it lined up with the Earth more accurately.

In the day it took the ship to reach Earth Atvar stayed at his post, laughing his strange half lizard, half human laugh even as the planet killer broke up in the atmosphere.

********

Drunk Atvar drank heavily from his bottle, weaving a little in his chair. "That'sh not quites what'sh I wanted," he said to the screen.  
He fell out of the chair laughing, "But ish shure was funny."

Getting back into the chair with some difficulty he deleted '_Atvar wins'_ and replaced it with '_Atvar wins and survives'._  
The machine hummed as it searched. As he drank and waited he was suddenly glad he had listened to the scientist, apparently the first search always came up negative. He raised his bottle shakily in salute of the dead Atvar and fell out of his chair again.


	3. Atvar Cthulu

_Ph'ngful mglw'nafh Cthuluhu R'lyeh wgah'nagi fhtagni  
_  
1925, Far From Earth

Exalted Lord Atvar convulsed awake from his deathless sleep of ages. His cyclopean coffin crumbled to dust as the eldritch energies that kept it and its prisoner whole leaked away in a sickly unearthly light.

The gargantuan form seemed to flow to the floor, its unnatural glutinous flesh undulating as it moved. It breathed out a foul, sickly stream of smoke, cleansing its lungs of the decayed, and dessicated humours that had stopped its bodily functions for untold eons.

A single eye turret turned a glazed and iridescent orb to the sky far above. The stars were right.

Clicking its moldering lips, its odious breathe formed dust clouds in the barren deserts of Home. Its misshapen mouth opened in a noiseless laugh. Death was dying. The Great Emperor awaited. The universe would burn.

**1942**

The year 1942 was a year of war. Throughout the world the forces of freedom fought the forces of fascism. Human fought human, brother fought brother. It was a time of insanity and hatred. They thought they fought a great war. They thought they knew pain and suffering. They thought they were lords of the world.  
They were less than ants.

The first signs of the death and chaos that awaited came subtly. Dreams once peaceful and reassuring became dark and deadly. At first people said it was the war, turning mans mind to darkness and despair. The weakest willed, the sensitive and empathic died in their sleep or turned to dark arts in vain attempts to bring peace to their shattered minds. The stronger and more ignorant folk simply dealt with the nightmares as they always had, ignoring them, turning to alcohol and anger.

As war raged in the waking world, war erupted in the dreams of man.

The viciousness of war became worse. Men who wouldn't think of harming an innocent shot at the merest suspicion of threat.

Men became monsters. Monsters became worse.

Finally the ships of the Race driven by the fires of Azothoth came to Earth. They filled the sky with their lights fantastic. The nonsensical lights of the abyss, a musty light that hadn't been seen for countless eons. As the light was seen people screamed. The sane became insane. Husband killed wife, wife killed children, children killed parents.

The Deep Ones arose bringing the second half of the Endless Night to meet their brothers.

Exalted Lord Atvar came to Earth. His parched, dusty, naked, reptilian body became one with the putrescent, slimy, unholy form of Mother Hydra. On the dead city of R'yleh they writhed, moaned and pleasured each other, their taloned hands raking their flesh, and their rotting bodies becoming one.  
From the pregnant, pulsating belly of Mother Hydra expanded, her slobbering mouth hung open in pain and glory. Around them the Race and the Deep Ones chanted their spiteful, spitting prayers, calling on their Emperor to come forth.

Mother Hydra howled an inhuman sound that drove the few sane people of the Pacific mad. Her belly ripped open and from within the steaming stew of flayed organs and torn flesh the Emperor Cthulu rose. The mere mortals of Earth died as his birth cries covered the land. Only the Deep Ones and the Race survived. Led by the Exalted Lord Atvar, the Earth became as it once was.

The stars were right and that which lay eternal awoke, and death died once more.

Drunk Atvar looked at his bottle of prune juice and vodka, and looked at the screen. Dropping the Pile Driver he decided it was time to go to bed.


	4. Atvar is Late

_Reporter 1: Dan what drugs were you on when you made Atvar into an eldritch entity? _

_Dan: I promise you I was not and have never been on any drugs. _

_Reporter 1: Are you sure? _

_Dan: Quite sure, next question. _

_Reporter 2: Was sleep deprivation, and alcohol involved? _

_Dan: Uh, uh, no further questions._

**1919**- After the Race army was placed in cryogenic sleep and placed on board the invasion fleet, some flaws were detected in the navigation system due to a certain unexpected astronomical occurrences. It is later discovered that a small black hole had passed through the area and caused minor disruptions in certain solar systems. The invasion is postponed until new data can be obtained and assimilated.

**1942**- The invasion fleet with its cargo held in stasis for over 20 years is finally launched. The hold up is considered unimportant.

**1942 to 1962** - Tosev 3 proceeds normally.

**July, 1962**: The Race invasion fleet arrives in Tosev space. Radio signals are immediately detected and cause panic amongst the Race. Atvar seriously considers turning around for Home.

**August, 1962**: After a month of discussions, debate, and study Atvar tentatively decides to awaken the fleet as they decide the best way to invade.  
**  
September, 1962**: The Race invasion fleet hides behind the moon to avoid immediate detection. Small shuttles are sent into orbit around the planet. They are detected, but it is unclear what they are.  
On Earth the NATO and Warsaw go on high alert.

**October 2, 1962**: A US spy plane detects a missile silo under construction in Cuba. They immediately demand the USSR cease construction and remove the missiles in Cuba at once. The USSR believing the USA is behind the strange radar reports refuses. Both sides prepare for war.

**October 3, 1962**: Atvar orders his scouts to enter the atmosphere to gain more data.  
**  
October 4, 1962**: Countries all over the world report high flying aircraft in their airspace. Warsaw and NATO aircraft try to intercept but mostly prove unable to reach the fast moving shuttles.  
On the East Coast of the USA, a daring pilot does manage to reach the shuttle by pushing his aircraft to the limit of its endurance and height. It is shot down before it can fire a shot.  
**  
October 5, 1962**: As the reports of the shot down aircraft spread throughout the world, all sides are confused, and many call for war, while a few sane voices try to calm the situation down.  
NATO believes the USSR has a super weapon and is probing their defences. The USSR believes the USA is spreading lies about the dog fight, and is secretly probing them.

**October 6, 1962: **A Lizard shuttle flies over Moscow several times well out of range of the air defences.  
Believing an attack is imminent the USSR declares war and attacks NATO with everything. Chemical weapons, nuclear bombs, heavy bombers attack NATO cities and bases throughout Europe, and parts of North America. The Warsaw armies all along the Iron Curtain drive into Europe.  
NATO forces launch their own nuclear arsenal against the USSR.  
Fleetlord Atvar and the rest of the Race Fleet watch in horror and fascination as the insane Big Uglies kill each other.

**October 7-12, 1962**: In 5 days of fighting much of Central Europe is destroyed and depopulated. Nuclear, chemical and biological weapons have destroyed the cities and countryside. NATO and Warsaw forces annihilated what is left. The rest of Europe suffers heavy damage.  
North America suffers some attacks as the few bombers and nuclear weapons in Cuba are launched in the first day. Ship and sub launched missiles hit cities along the coast. Some intercontinental missiles destroy Washington, New York and several other coastal cities.  
The USSR is hit hard by nuclear missiles and bombers that destroy much of its infrastructure.  
By the 12th, both sides are shadows of their former selves and the armies in Europe are largely destroyed.

**October 13, 1962**: Fleetlord Atvar orders an immediate study on the effects of the fallout and debris in the atmosphere. He and the Shiplords begin planning an attack now that the two biggest not-empires are on their knees.

**November 12, 1962**: As the larger Asian countries, South American and Pacific Countries try to bring aid to North America and Europe, Africa and colonial countries in Asia are in turmoil now that the colonizers are dead or dying.  
Europe is suffering massive famine and plagues due to the fallout, reduced temperature from smoke, a lack of infrastructure and government control, as well as countless dead.  
North America is better but the loss of key cities and infrastructure as well as a reduced government has left much of the country under only limited control.  
Russia is a collapsed country suffering from civil war.  
The Middle East was heavily hit but most of the attention was on the oil fields. It is a warzone but only a small one at this point.

**November 13th, 1962**: The Invasion Fleet launches its attack. No nuclear weapons are used, but Australia, China, and the USA are hit very hard with conventional weapons. The centers of government that were trying to regain control are all taken in the first day. In North America, a handful of remaining nuclear weapons are used, but most such weapons are destroyed in the first few attack waves.  
More limited operations are launched in Africa, the Middle East, Asia and South America. The hellhole of Europe is avoided for the time being.

**December 25th 1962**: After taking a beating in the October War, the Race is able to conquer most of the US relatively easily. There is still extensive guerrilla activity, but the major civilian centers, military forces and government are captured.

**January, 1963**: With no outside support and a small army Australia is conquered by mid-January.  
Large parts of Africa and the Middle East are conquered, often simply by provided the civilians with food and security against the roving bands of soldiers and rebels.  
China and Asia proves more difficult to conquer but the major cities are taken.  
South and Central America are much like Asia, but the desert regions are taken with only limited trouble.

**March, 1963**: The first Race forces move into Europe and Russia. The surviving governments have had time to prepare for the Race, but they are unable to provide much resistance. Britain and Spain hold out the longest in the Scottish Highlands and Pyrenees respectively. Many refugees welcome the Race as saviors when they provide food and medicine to the pathetic masses.

**December, 1963**: Africa is declared conquered, as the last remnants of the South African army is destroyed. Rebels remain but they are limited to the deep jungles and mountains.  
The main cities of Mexico and Central America are largely conquered, the Yucatan and deep jungles are the last hold out.  
Much of South America is nominally under Lizard control, especially the larger population centers. While the Andes and much of the Amazon remain in human hands, the limited population and inhospitable environment make this only a mild concern for Atvar.  
Asia continues to prove the main sore point for the Race plans.

**1964**: While much of the world is pacified and rebuilt after the two great wars, Asia and South America are a hotbed of low intensity fighting. More and more forces are sent to the continent, and Japan after being ignored for a year is conquered.

**1965**: The noose tightens around the human forces in Asia, Amazon and parts of North America. Now that virtually every factory in the world is under Fleetlord Atvars control, weapons are becoming ever harder to get. With the lack of anti-tank and anti-aircraft weapons the attrition rate amongst Race soldiers drops dramatically. Race factories are also being brought online supplying ammo and small arms to the Race.

**1970**: Only the most die hard rebels remain in deep hiding. Suffering from a lack of supplies rebels have to resort to stolen Race weapons, improvised bombs, and home made gunpowder. Sabotage in factories and passive aggressive resistance is common but violence is much less common.  
In Europe and parts of the USA and Canada which were badly damaged in the October War many people are grateful to the Race for bringing peace and food.

**1975**: Europeans and a majority of Arabs are the most loyal citizens of the Race. They take most of the high level positions amongst the Race bureaucracy.  
North Americans are mixed between support and hatred, so they are watched closely but can advance without too much problem.  
Africa and South America are not trusted very much as many people in both countries believe their chance to grow and take power in the aftermath of the October War was destroyed by the Race. While fighting is uncommon they're most likely to support sit down strikes and sabotage.  
Australia and Asia are not trusted at all and can only achieve prominence in their own city. The Australians are still upset at losing the war.  
Asia after suffering from years of war is still recovering, with a seething layer of outrage over some of the atrocities committed by Race soldiers, which included inducing famines in rebel areas by cutting off all outside access to the area and bombing farms.

**1982**: The Colonization fleet arrives. While they're shocked at the level of devastation in Europe and North America, after reviewing the files the leaders agree that Atvar did a remarkable job considering the circumstances.  
The Race begins making towns and cities in the choicer spots around the world. There are no Race communities in Europe however, only military bases and small factories.

**2010**: After nearly 50 years of Race control Tosev 3 is hardly a jewel in the Emperors crown, but it is a growing planet that has recovered from its destructive wars of the 1960's.  
Tosev scientists are respected for their insight but kept on a very tight leash until they learn patience.  
More and more Tosevs are learning to accept the Race ideology and even the dissenters mostly limit themselves to demonstrations and petty vandalism.  
Europe has healed and due to being lightly populated by the Race it is largely free of the species-ism that covers much of the rest of the planet, which makes it one of the more peaceful places to live.  
Fleetlord Atvar was officially commended for his actions in a difficult situation, and has retired to his home in the Australian outback to watch the results of his planning with satisfaction.

"That Bashtard!" Drunk Atvar shouted in rage.  
"Ish nosh fair! That Bashturd hash it eashy! The Big Bastards killed themselshes! It'sh not Fair!"  
Stumbling over to the fridge he'd ordered for the lab, he pulled a new bottle out and clumsily opened it.  
"Why's can'st I getsh it eshay? WHY!?"


End file.
